Wednesday, April 27, 2011

MY head is spinning and no vodka was involved....

WHAT ?? You want to take out how much of my what ? STOP!!!. Lets rewind this show a little huh.
         I am Jim Walters and have struggled with a weight problem since puberty. So no i wasn't one of those 80 lb 4 years old on Maury with a chicken leg in one hand and a cigarette in the other and a mom wondering why I am so big already? It started gradually, i liked chocolate and hated vegetables, its not rocket science. I always wanted to try and lose weight get healthier, start doing things i loved and missed like fitting into rides at the amusement park or going swimming without my shirt on. There was always a deadline. I will make 21 the year i change my life, I am NOT going into my 30's a fattie, I refuse to turn 35 at this size. well I am now 37 and at the biggest I have ever been. Weight loss surgery was always something others had mentioned to me but i considered that failing, come on chubbie just put down the cheeseburger!! And there was NO WAY i wanted to have the saggy left over skin. I would rather be fat then have that i would tell myself, and MEAN it. Well I finally found out that none of this is as easy as i thought it would be or should be. Only took me 24 years to figure this out (and I am suppose to be the smart one on in my family). So now I am 37 years old and get winded from washing my hair or walking from my bed to the bathroom. Something is wrong I have never really had any health problems attached to my weight other then the dreaded SLEEP APNEA, which i was never officially diagnosed with since i refused to go get it checked out. But i never had high blood pressure, cholesterol, diabetes etc. very very lucky. But now i sweat from a big lunch?? Come on!!! Now i am getting scared. My sleep deprivation is getting worse i have to take control of my life. Is it time ? Should i really look into this?? Do i finally give in and realize i need help??? Yes ! its time for weight loss surgery ( dum dum dum ).
 This is me at my starting size 
        Appointment made. 4:30 appointment in Union NJ, ewww pithole area but ok I am sure the office will be better. OH! guess i was wrong there. However these people seem friendly so i can deal with it. Little did i know it was going to be a 2 hour office visit and i would wind up liking these people quite a bit. OK time to be seen, blood pressure and weigh in time yikes !! well BP not bad 140/83 and i am nervous. Weight .. WHAT ??? are you kidding me ? I don't even think I can blog about it yet. but lets just say i thought people this large were trapped in bed wearing bed sheet muumuu's .
       Now the nutrionalist comes down to see me and wants me up stairs.
Are the stairs ok ??
OK for who ? dont you have my chart in front of you i am thinking ?? plus i was just seen this morning for a cat scan for a possible deflated lung (different story and was a false alarm). I will meet you upstairs she tells me.
           So they want to know if i have thought about what kind of surgery I wanted, now I work for a large company that makes a certain stomach band and i just assumed that was what i was going with. However there are 3 different procedures each with different outcomes etc, the doc will tell you more ok later for that. The Nutritionist told me exactly what i already knew , no soda, juice, no late night eating. Also cut back on the fruits and up the veggies, easier said then done for a card carrying veggie hater. We will see how that goes. Now off to see the insurance guru.
          Wow that's a lot of paperwork she has there i was thinking i had to jump through some hoops but i feel like a circus poodle now. I have to have how many tests done? Lets break them down, stress test, vericose duplex, sleep study, blood work, chest x-ray, ekg, attend a seminar, see a psychologist, one hour with a nutritionist, vascular surgery to put an umbrella filter in my vein to prevent clots, anything else ? mm i think i forgot a couple. MAN this has become daunting. Dont these people know i am very large and LAZY, i have struggled for 24 years with this lets just schedule the surgery for this friday huh ?? Well that's a no go since i need to be seen by them for 3-4 months before surgery gets scheduled. This is not an easy process. My head is spinning and i haven't had any cocktails to make me feel this way.
         Well now i see the doctor and she is very nice and warm and i like her. So she starts telling me about the different tests and she thinks the gastric sleeve might be best for me. I say well i was kind of hoping for a low invasive surgery something thats not drastic, what does this sleeve entail?
 Well we remove about 85 % of your stomach, leaving you with a small stomach sleeve.  In case you missed my first word in the blog ..WHAT ??? O.K. i need to attend this seminar but right now i am still thinking the band, she says people with the band only lose about 50 % of their excess body weight ? UMMMMM I am cool with that. But be sure I will let you know what i decide. So my first appointment was yesterday 04/26 and i have made a lot of my other appointments for the next few weeks. Keep you all posted .. Jim - Diary of a fat man.